Choose The Path To A Happy Life

Many psychologists now believe that emotional intelligence is more important than IQ—both at work and at play.

- Susannah Hickling

GLENN HINDS WAS ANXIOUS AS HE PREPARED to play in the first round of his golf club’s singles championship. But rather than ignoring his nerves and getting on with it, as he had always done, the 50-year-old training consultant from Derry in Northern Ireland applied some of the lessons he’d just learned on a work course.

He got into his car and consciously took a moment to notice how he was feeling. This prompted a series of small realizations. “First of all, this was just a game of golf,” Glenn says. “Secondly, I wanted to win but could lose and, thirdly, the chances were that I’d get some stick from my mates. But in terms of the big picture I would be OK.”

He was a man transformed. “My fear went away and I went out there relaxed.” Not only did he win that game, but he was victorious in the next six matches and became club champion for 2016.

Glenn was drawing on his training in emotional intelligence, the ability to perceive and manage emotions in ourselves and others. Emotional intelligence—or emotion quotient (EQ)—is a relatively new branch of psychology, first defined by US researchers Peter Salovey and John Mayer in the 1990s and popularized by science journalist and psychologist Daniel Goleman in his book, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ.

Goleman identifies several key characteristics of emotional intelligence: self-awareness (understanding our own emotions); self-regulation (staying in control); motivation (selfdiscipline); empathy (understanding and sharing the feelings of others); and social skills (building self-confidence). See panel on p.xx.

Perhaps surprisingly, EQ has little to do with showing your feelings or with national characteristics.