Fins can only get better as Jaws meets some real drama queens

One of the best T-shirts doing the rounds at the moment has 'Amity 1975' on it in a retro print, with a sunset and a yacht.

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Unless you live in a box (or under the sea) you'll be aware it's the 50th anniversary of the movie Jaws this year.

Half a century since we were terrorised by that giant plastic monster with the googly eyes and big pretend teeth; since the unfeasibly ancient mother of the young lad who was eaten by the shark took off her horn-rimmed glasses and sobbed uncontrollably onto her 1970s print dress.

And five decades since the phrase 'we're going to need a bigger boat' was coined. And that's exactly the sentiment when you see the lineup for Shark! Celebrity Infested Waters on ITV. How will all those showbiz luvvies and their egos fit on board?

Sadly, in the first episode anyway, not one of them ends up as a great white's breakfast, although it seems some of their agents have made a dog's dinner of explaining what's involved.

Disappointingly, it doesn't involve anyone being voted overboard and it does include some rare good PR for sharks. You're left wondering whether some of them read past the 'filmed in the Bahamas' line, such is the utter shock when they're expected to get into the water with a bunch of bull sharks.