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HOW CAN I GROW AT WORK IF I CAN'T OUTGROW BEING A PEOPLE-PLEASER?

The Philippine Star

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October 04, 2024

My quiet compliance became a double-edged sword, leaving me exploited, sidelined, and afraid to challenge the system.

- By MIKAELA GABRIELLE DE CASTRO

HOW CAN I GROW AT WORK IF I CAN'T OUTGROW BEING A PEOPLE-PLEASER?

A fter graduation, I chased a dream that mixed Carrie Bradshaw with Rebecca Bloomwood: weekday writing in Ayala and weekend shopping in Salcedo. Although I curated a polished image of success, hidden beneath were insecurities, as my usual eloquence faltered in the rigid world of corporate jargon.

My school habits of overextending myself to please others, taking on more than my share in group projects, and zealously exceeding expectations, even when it led to imbalance or burnout, did not disappear with my graduation cap.

They followed me into the office and every corner of adulthood.

Adjusting to the working world, I struggled between being the compliant student I had been and the confident professional I needed to be.

HONOR ROLL ENDS AT GRADUATION

The formulaic qualities that had once made me a stellar student, like agreeableness and over-preparedness, left me confused. My quiet compliance became a double-edged sword, leaving me exploited, sidelined, and afraid to challenge the system.

Psychologist Dr. Marinette Asuncion-Uy, Psy.D., a specialist in decolonizing mental health, referenced Virgilio Enriquez's Sikolohiyang Pilipino to explain that the resources that once empowered our success in school aren't a one-shoe-fits-all solution as we enter the professional world.

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