Flying solo: how I beat my single parent holiday fears

Being sole responsible adult while abroad can feel daunting, so Victoria Richards shares the secret to giving her children (and herself) a trip away to remember... for the right reasons

- By Victoria Richards

What would you imagine is the hardest part about taking your kids away alone, abroad, as a single parent? You might think – as I did – that it would be the torture of constant questions, from “Can I have a snack?” to the more surreal, such as how naked mole rats keep warm in winter. (Answer: they huddle in large groups and are ectothermic, meaning their body temperature fluctuates with the temperature outside. Who knew!)

I can attest how exhausting it is to act as a walking-talking-cuddling version of Wikipedia, but that wasn't the hardest aspect of my first holiday abroad as a single parent. Nor was it missing the company of other adults. For one, we all went to bed at the same time - show me a person over 40 who enjoys staying up past 10pm, and I'll show you a liar - and we were also all in the same bed.

That's right - sharing a family suite meant we got to push three beds together to form one giant super-super-king. Perfect for jumping on, for binge-watching Building the Band on Netflix (our new guilty pleasure) on and for the fact that nobody could kick anyone else in the face in the middle of the night, though of course they tried.

I didn't miss adult company because my children have such mad, hilarious and chaotic views and opinions, I'd choose them to hang out with over pretty much anyone. No, the trickiest part about taking my kids, 13 and nine, away solo was having to make all the decisions. Where to eat, which activity, whether it is safe, should we dig a huge hole on the beach and sit in it? (The answer to that last one is always “yes”). Emotional baggage can feel heavy, but diving into the challenge can help lighten the load (AFP/Getty)

Just someone - anyone - else to act as a reassuring voice in my ear; to tell me I’m making the right call, that I’m doing the right thing. That’s what I missed. I coped by outsourcing my dilemmas and hummingbird-brained concerns to my friends.