Advent calendars are out of control and it needs to stop

How did we get from cardboard nativity scenes to collections of high-end beauty products or 24 crocheted emotional support vegetables? Helen Coffey reckons enough's enough

- Helen Coffey

How many pairs of period pants does one person need? It’s not a question one often feels the need to ask, and yet it’s the inevitable query when an email lands in my inbox introducing the “world’s first period Advent calendar”. Unbelievable as it may seem, no one had ever thought to fashion an Advent calendar dedicated to menstrual products until now.

For those willing to shell out £130, they'll be greeted each day with something different to support their cycle, from light-flow thongs and heavy-flow briefs to “hormone support” gummies and heat patches.

While I’m all for “breaking taboos” and “increasing period visibility”, as the brand in question puts it, I can’t for the life of me fathom who the target market for such a thing is. Mothers for their pubescent daughters, perhaps? (Though, from a teenager’s perspective, I imagine little could be more cringe.) Surely not men – or indeed women – for their partners? It’s a far cry from a romantic or sentimental gesture.

To spend that amount of money on anyone for a novelty pre-Christmas gift is a bizarrely extra flex. And, when you get right down to it, there’s not much in life that feels less festive than the monthly shedding of one’s womb lining.