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My greatest regret as a father – Mandela

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June 11, 2025

BEING a father is no easy road — but it does comes with bountiful rewards. As dads all over South Africa prepare for Father's Day celebrations on Sunday, they will look forward to being pampered by their children and loved ones for being their protector, nurturer, care-giver, supporter and role model. Their hearts will swell with pride as their children shower them with little gifts, boundless love and undivided attention on this special day.

As we raise our glasses to all fathers and father figures on Sunday, let's spare a thought for those not fortunate to have enjoyed the just rewards of a rich family life. And one of the most prominent and revered among such fathers was ironically the Father of the Nation himself - our first democratic president, Nelson Mandela.

Mandela chose a noble and courageous mission in life -to fight on behalf of all his people against injustice and racial subjugation in the country of his birth. But it came at a serious personal cost.

Because he was constantly hounded by the apartheid police and eventually jailed on Robben Island for 27 years, he struggled to balance his family life and the fight for freedom. There were long periods when, through circumstances beyond his control, he was forced to be away from home, missing the warmth and joys of a bonding family experience.

In his book A Long Walk to Freedom, he lamented the painful failure of his two marriages and expressed regret about the emotional trauma this caused his children. His commitment to the ANC struggle to end apartheid meant he was unable to enjoy a normal and stable family life.

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