What I've learned-and unlearned-about self-worth on social media

A teen's perspective on dopamine, digital addiction, and self-worth

- By MACKENZIE YAP HUANG Grade 9 International School Manila

When I was in eighth grade, I posted about an archery competition I was in. It received over 50 likes in under an hour. I felt amazing. People commented things like "Congrats!" and fire emojis—and I won't lie, it felt good. I kept refreshing my screen to see the number grow. A week later, I took a more casual photo, posted it, and walked away. When I checked hours later, the count crawled to barely fifteen. I stared at the screen, chewing my lip: Was it the angle, my tired face, the outfit, or just the feed itself losing steam?

That was the first time I noticed how much I had started measuring my self-worth by hearts on a screen.

Dopamine and the Like button

There's science behind that feeling. Studies have shown that every time we get a like, comment, or new follower, our brains release dopamine—a feel-good chemical that gives us feelings of pleasure, motivation, and reward. It's behind our feelings of happiness whenever we accomplish a task, eat a favorite snack, or spend time with friends and family.

But social media has hacked that system. Likes and notifications are designed to trigger dopamine hits, so we keep scrolling, posting, and checking. It's addictive. For me, I noticed I'd check Instagram first thing in the morning-before I even said good morning to my parents. If I posted something, I'd check back every five minutes just to see the numbers change.

At some point, it wasn't even about the post. It was about validation.

The "Highlight Reel" trap

The thing is, we don't post the real stuff online. I've cried over school stress, fought with friends, had breakouts, and felt anxious-but you'll never see that on my feed. What do people see? Vacation selfies, perfect filters, new outfits, animals.