Ways to reduce the stress, costs of tying the knot

Weddings are meant to be celebrations of love. They may also require invited guests to make a financial commitment that brings them stress.

- By ADRIANA MoRGA

Whether it’s paying for hotels and flights to attend a destination wedding or different outfits and gifts for multiple pre-wedding events, friends and extended family often feel pressure to spend a large amount of money before the couple gets married.

Asense of obligation and budget constraints can create resentment, hurt feelings and misunderstandings among friends and family. Future spouses who are trying to plan their dream wedding and are worried about their own expenses might want to factor in their guests’ potential costs.

“Money is part of how we show up for one another,” Christine Hargrove, a licensed therapist who serves as assistant director of the Love and Money Center at the University of Georgia. “But don’t let finances get in the way of lifelong friendships or family relationships that are healthy and supportive.”

Hargrove often sees budgeting issues becoming friendship issues for couples and members of their wedding party.

While asking someone to be a groomsman ora bridesmaid usually is intended to show appreciation, sometimes left unacknowledged is the possible financial burden of being part of a bachelor or bachelorette party, as well as the big day itself.

“If somebody says, ‘I care about you, I really want to come to your wedding but I absolutely cannot afford five days in the Caribbean on top of already going to a wedding, don’t take it personally,” Hargrove said.

Conversations surrounding money can be very emotional, but everyone involved will benefit if they approach the topic with understanding, said Hargrove.