His wife is not the monster he claims

I RECENTLY met my lover’s wife for the first time.

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She's absolutely stunning, tall and blonde with legs up to her armpits. And really nice too!

She came into our work with fresh lemonade she'd made for all the staff. She told me she loved my dress, and we chatted about fashion.

I really warmed to her, which is confusing as he’s always told me she’s an unfriendly, uptight minger.

He and I have been hooking up for secret sex sessions over six months. He refuses to pay for hotels. He prefers sex in car parks, on dodgy doggy sites and down back alleys. In other words, the riskiest locations he can find.

He used to say that he couldn't book hotels (even by the hour) because his wife was so controlling and mean. Now he simply says he prefers to be outside.