Watch your WORDS

Being polite is important in relationships, but kill them with kindness' can be a little too much in the workplace environment

- Saadiqah Schroeder

Whether you’re starting a new job, transferring to a different division or trying to get on the good side of your boss or supervisor, we can often be ‘too nice’ or overly apologetic. “Typically, people who are very apologetic or are always saying sorry are people who are eager to please others and be liked,” says personal coach Penny Holburn. This is not always a bad thing – after all, we all want to be considered reliable and considerate, but the problem arises when we use apologetic or overly polite language too much.

Speaking with self-doubt means that those around us will doubt our competency and capabilities, too. In her book Nice Girls Don’t Get the Corner Office, Dr Lois Frankel advises: “Separate ‘being liked’ and ‘getting what you deserve’ by rewording a request into a polite statement about what is needed.”

Over-cautious choice of words or speech comes from a fear of judgement, self-doubt and trying to ensure the well-being of others, but that doesn’t mean it can’t be helped. We asked Penny to identify a few common phrases we use at work, and how we can rephrase them to sound more confident:

“Sorry, but…”