IT'S THEIR DRAMA, NOT YOURS

Motivational guru Mel Robbins explains why you should stop trying to rescue others and focus on your own goals and happiness instead

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LET them. These two little words will set you free, says Mel Robbins.

Let people be who they are and do what they do. Stop wasting your time and energy trying to control things you can't control, like other people's opinions, moods or actions.

Your dad makes a yet another comment about your life choices? Let him have his opinions. A colleague at work is in a bad mood? Let them be grumpy. Don't let their negative energy affect you.

Cultivating a "Let Them" mindset will free you from the exhausting cycle of trying to manage everything and everyone around you, says the bestselling author and motivational speaker in her new book, The Let Them Theory. And it will also free you up to focus on what really matters – your own happiness, growth and goals.

But how do you say “Let Them” when someone’s behaviour isn't just annoying or disappointing? What if they're doing something that’s not good for them? What if they're struggling? Do you just let them struggle? In this extract from her book Mel explains how to apply the Let Them theory in these situations and support someone who's struggling in the right way.

I KNOW what you may be thinking: let adults be adults? What if the person is in serious trouble? What am I supposed to do, just Let Them spiral? Let Them drink and drive?

Of course not.

If someone is doing something dangerous or self-destructive, you don’t just Let Them. You step in, take the keys, or do whatever is necessary to help because your response might just save their life – whether that’s calling for help or calling the police or driving them to detox or staying with them through a crisis until they’re in a safe place.