Don't let Thames sewage kill off this lovely boat

Samuel Pepys mentions oysters in his diaries 68 times, but that was when they were as common as winkles along the banks of the Thames and when they were a source of cheap protein for the masses.

- DICK DUBHAM

That was also before the discharge of London’s effluent killed off the spat.

With the disgraceful state of our privately owned water supplies – notably Thames Water and its discharge of raw sewage making headlines on a regular basis – it is surprising any of the knobbly bivalves are left.

But on any day along the shorelines of the Thames Estuary you can spot handpickers collecting oysters, breaking them open and squeezing their innards into plastic bottles for the manufacture of oyster sauce.

Personally, I would only swallow an oyster from a reputable fishing company who know and understand the spawning season, the intricate methods of cleaning and preparation for the plate.

Many wonder what all the fuss is about and whether the love of the oyster is really a love of a vehicle for the ingestion of finely diced and vinegarised red onion, a squeeze of fresh lemon juice or Tabasco sauce – or, as in my case, all three.