MY BIGGEST Challenge

DR ICHAK ADIZES tackles the tricky topic of acceptance as the starting point for change, especially self-acceptance. He reminds us that without self-acceptance things generally get worse rather than better.

- DR ICHAK ADIZES/Ichak Kalderon Adizes

My biggest challenge is to practice what I preach. My whole life has been dedicated to developing, documenting, and training others to practice mutual trust and respect. And that means first and foremost, accepting other people’s differences. This is very easy to understand but difficult to practice. People annoy me when they think, act, or react differently than how I want them to.

When I get annoyed with people, the first word that comes to mind is “Why?” “Why don’t you … ? Why are you doing this, or acting like that or … ?” There’s no end to the “why’s” and it is not strange that there are no satisfactory answers. My frustrations are most acute towards people who are closest to me. Let’s start with my children. “Why do you … ? Why don’t you … ?” Why, why, why! And usually, there are no good answers that satisfy me.

Even closer to me than my children is my wife. In this case, the roles are reversed. It seems that God has sent her to this world to “fix” me. To change me. From her perspective, everything I do needs to be improved or changed. She claims, although I am not fully aware of it, that I do the same to her.