5 Tips To Make The Most Of Your Child's Vacations

Divorced parents dread vacations because it’s a challenge to make sure children get quality time on their holiday. Rushmika Banerjee has some amiable solutions.

- Rushmika Banerjee

Seema*, 35, a banking professional from Mumbai, is on edge with her 10-year-old son, Rahul*, every time a school vacation approaches. Last year, Rahul had to spend his vacation at home alone as Seema and her ex-husband, Amit*, were too busy with work to plan one with him. It led to a lot of heartache and fights. Things are not much better when one of the parents can make the time—if the other doesn’t bother to. After her parents divorced, nine-year-old Priya stayed with her mother. While during the first few months, her father would come visit her and take her out, this eventually stopped. Now, he never has the time.

Children are the invisible third party to a divorce. With the parents focusing on legalities, finances and recovering from the heartbreak, many of a child’s anxieties don’t register as prominently. Chief among these is the desire to belong. According to Bena D’Souza, a clinical psychologist from Goa, “Children tend to compare themselves with their peers and if they do not receive attention from their parents like their peers do, they find ways to get it. In the case of a child whose parents are divorced, they may not understand why this has happened. Some blame themselves for the divorce, while others retreat into a shell.”