My teen won't communicate

LET COUNSELLOR KEREN LIGHTEN YOUR LOAD

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Q I'm struggling to connect with my teenage son. I try to talk to him, but he either ignores me or snaps. I want to support him, but I feel like I'm failing as a parent. How can I reach him without making things worse? Janice, Coventry

AParenting a teenager can sometimes seem like navigating a minefield and it's normal to occasionally feel helpless. I understand you're frustrated with him, but wonder how you're talking to him. Teenagers often respond better when they feel heard rather than lectured.

Respecting his privacy while showing support is important. Let him know you're available and care, without pressuring him to open up to you. This is a stage when young people want their independence, so don't see it as a rejection. With time, I'm sure he'll become more responsive and want to relate.

Not ready to stop work

Q My husband is 20 years older than me. He's retired and at a bit of a loose end. He's nagging me to reduce the days I work so I can spend more time with him. But I feel as though I've only really got back into the groove since I had time off having children and I don't want to reduce my days. He sees this as a rejection of him. Ruth, London