MULTI gen LIVING Success or stress?

Kids, parents and grandparents all under one roof is on the rise, but it's not without complications, as Kim Willis explains

- Kim Willis

Nothing kills that Sunday morning, post-bonk dance around the kitchen quite like having your dad pad into the room and say 'Oh, are we having pancakes?' before helping himself to some maple syrup and criticising your moves. Inviting my dad, Bryan, now 81, to move home from Malaysia and live with me, my husband Gaz, 42, and son Heli, two, 12 years ago has been eventful. We bought a farmhouse in Wiltshire and converted the cowshed for Dad. He looked after me when I was a child, so it felt right to return that gift. I cherish our nature walks around the garden, but have also cried, fumed and sulked, because the old man sure can trigger me.

When the pandemic forced my sister Tammi, now 48, home from Thailand, we offered her sanctuary and she never left. Now Gaz and I are parents, our multigenerational abode has come into its own. Heli adores Grandad and Aunt Tam Tam, and we get incredible support with the logistics of parenthood. Multigen living benefits all involved. Lonely people are more likely to die early from all causes, according to a review of over 90 studies*.

My dad has gone from living alone on the other side of the world for 20 years to being surrounded by family. He moved to Malaysia for the warmth and lifestyle, and I used to visit several times a year. But when my career and family life took over, my visits became less frequent – and he began to feel lonely. When he decided it was time to return to the UK, it made sense to us both to move in together. Pooling resources makes the rising cost of living less painful.