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I CATFISHED MY HUSBAND

WOMAN'S OWN

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February 24, 2025

Jade Costa, 37, pretended to be someone else online to meet people. She explains why she never meant to hurt anyone

I CATFISHED MY HUSBAND

Sitting alone in my bedroom, I logged on to my computer to register as a user on Gaia Online, a fantasy-world chat room. But rather than sign up as myself, I created a whole new persona.

After moving in with my mum following a bad break-up, I was lonely and thought I might be able to find like-minded people to share my interest in gaming. But at 18, I worried about online predators, so decided it would be safer if I posed as a gay Japanese man called ‘Toshie’. I never imagined Toshie would lead me to my soulmate.

At first, it was great. I found myself surrounded by people like me, with interests from fashion to gaming, and I made some amazing friends. I found myself drawn to a man named Luke, who was a Samurai character. No matter what time I logged on, I’d always find myself looking for him – he was very shy but I liked that he would open up to me.

We had deep conversations about everything we loved, such as anime and gaming, and I always felt excited when I found him online. As our friendship deepened, so did another I had with a guy called Hajjah*.

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