Bullying in school: Why 'we have handled it' isn't enough for parents

Having been both a teacher managing cases and a parent of a bullied child, I understand the vital role of communication.

- Elisha Tushara

As a former secondary school teacher, I have had to deal with my fair share of bullying cases. More often than not, I felt like a failure.

This was especially so when these incidents happened right under my nose, or when bullying continued even though the matter had already been dealt with.

I remember a particular incident in 2021, when I had to inform a parent that his son had been punched in the stomach by a classmate in the classroom. No teacher was present then.

The father's first reaction was: "Oh my god! How did this happen?"

Though I explained that the bully had been taken to task and his parents would also be informed, I could sense the utter disappointment and worry from the flurry of questions that followed.

He was not convinced that the school was a safe space for his child and that teachers could protect the boy from harm.

"Will you make sure this does not happen again? Why was there no teacher in the class? Is my son in pain? No one helped him? Has this happened before?"

When I told him I needed more time to get more information, he was unsatisfied, and rightly so.

I was one of the adults he entrusted his child to in school. How could I not give him assurance that his son had not been bullied before this incident?

Oddly enough, when a boy spat in my son's face in school in 2022, I had the same set of questions for my son's teacher.

My biggest fear was that it would happen again, and the teachers would not be able to stop it.

As a teacher back then, I should have been able to sympathize with how demanding a teacher's job can be.

But when my parent hat was on and my child's well-being was threatened, there was no space to consider the complexities of a teacher's job.

A few days later, my son came home crying. The boy had spat in his face a second time.