No sex please, we're Gen Z

It's often bandied around that young people aren't having as much sex as their forefathers.

- WORDS BY CLAUDIA COCKERELL

A 2024 study from the Kinsey Institute found that Gen Z had sex on average three times a month, compared to Millennials and Gen X whose average was five times a month. Yet for many young Londoners, it's a choice. While some are opting to have more meaning-ful sex with fewer partners, others are writing it off altogether and taking up voluntary celibacy.

"Sex has lost a lot of sex appeal," says Lara, 27, who lives in west London and has not had sex in two years. "From a young age I felt I had to have sex in order to feel wanted," she explains. "I used to revolve my life so much around the guy I was seeing or dating, and with that came having sex, even if I didn't feel like it."

Lara decided to go celibate in an attempt to reconnect with herself, and hasn't looked back. "It gives me so much more time to focus on myself. I now feel so happy and confident in myself." Does she miss sex? "Truly, no." There's the occasional bout of horniness, "but it usually passes pretty quickly".

Celibacy is even proving popular on Feeld, the kink-led dating app du jour for young Londoners. It is aimed at anyone with non-conventional sexual desires, from BDSM and fetishes to couples looking to throuple up. Users can choose from a list of "Desires" to add to their profile, from bondage to FWB (friends with benefits).

Yet for a platform which is nominally about facilitating intimate experiences, Feeld found that the fastest growing desire in London in 2024 was celibacy. The celibacy tag has seen a 235 per cent uptick on the profiles of users in the city.