Beeb's drips ensure that romance is dead

DESPAIR of the BBC. Once a vital part of our national culture, they have clearly run out of drive, ideas and judgment. Their latest wheeze, Stranded On Honeymoon Island, is a belated attempt to catch up with Love Island, Too Hot To Handle, Love Is Blind, Flex On My Ex and Look At Me, I'm Starkers (I only made one of those up).

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The BBC1 show incorporates elements of the equally dumb Married At First Sight. Single wannabes go speed-dating and choose their favourite. Then “relationship experts” pick the one they'll marry in a “not legally binding” Philippines beach ceremony.

They take the plunge, literally, to reach their under-stocked honeymoon shack. And after three weeks living alone together, with just bugs, scorpions and a camera crew for company, they progress to Couples Cove where other options are available...And they say romance is dead.

The show makes a mockery of marriage and squanders licence fee money that'd be better spent developing mass-appeal comedies or a much-needed modern-day equivalent of 50s show Free Speech.

The only thing in its favour is it isn't Dating Naked UK. Give them time. It almost makes you pine for the cheesy innocence of Blind Date.

BBC1's imported hit The Traitors inspired lesser knockoffs like ITV’s The Fortune Hotel and now Channel 4's ratings bomb The Inheritance. The premise is simple. Liz Hurley is dead - rigor mortis is clearly setting in as she struggles with the autocue - and like The Traitors, contestants form tactical alliances, take part in dull challenges, and back-stab their rivals as they battle for modest chunks of Liz’s loot.