MY GIRL SLEEPS AROUND

MY girl is a drama queen. Not only, that, but she’s sneaky too.

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During the four years we've been together I’ve realised that she has a system.

Every so often she gets itchy feet. She becomes restless, argumentative and unreasonable.

She picks holes in everything I do from washing the pots to putting the rubbish out. She calls me names, winds me up and pushes me to my limit.

Then she accuses me of some crime - siding with her parents, spending money on rubbish or disrespecting her feelings - and blows her top. She orchestrates a massive fight and storms out.

It’s during these absences that she goes off with other men for rampant sex or goes round to a friend’s house and takes loads of recreational drugs.