No need to multi-mask

We all assume different personas, as a survival hack. How else can we deal with the world? I'm trying a new way: a whole self, honest, intact

- Charles Assisi

Most people carry around more than one version of themselves. There's a version that goes to work, knows how to sound agreeable at meetings, and says things like "Interesting point" when they disagree.

There's the version that attends family events, knows what not to say, laughs politely, and smiles on cue for photographs.

And then there's the version we are when no one else is watching. When one is finally done explaining, nodding, pretending to always be okay.

Most of us live like this. We don't question it. It's considered part of being a grown-up. It's a survival tactic; how else would one cope, once the age of tantrums and slammed doors had passed?

Still, something about this way of being started to wear thin for me. There was no sudden breakthrough. The unease came quietly. Like realising the shoes one had been wearing for years don't fit right any more.

Nothing changed. And yet everything feels different.

Part of it has to do with emotional clarity. Who am I, when I'm not trying to "manage" myself (or others)?