Law denied Mum her birthday wish to die with dignity
Daily Express
|January 02, 2026
MY MUM'S name was Kate Bilderbeck and her 59th birthday wish was to die.
As she struggled to blow out the candle on her cupcake in August, she prayed to God she wouldn't survive another day. In fact she lived another agonising six. She had been a nurse for more than 20 years, working everywhere from Romanian orphanages to Great Ormond Street Hospital and, later, with Alzheimer's patients. She was also a single mum, raising her only child, me.
And Kate Bilderbeck was one hell of a stubbornly positive woman. Having been diagnosed in 2022 with terminal pancreatic cancer, where many would've, quite justifiably, retreated, my mum wore her diagnosis as a superhero would a cape. She raised awareness about pancreatic cancer at every opportunity and vowed to embody the late Deborah James' mantra of "rebellious hope". My mum was determined not only to survive but to thrive, living with purpose and joy for as long as she could.
I dropped my life, moved home, and my mum's rebellious hope gave us not just "one year, if lucky", but an incredible three. We embarked on a bucket list, fitting it around more than 60 gruelling rounds of chemotherapy. My mum didn't do chemo like anyone else; she wore bright outfits each time one Easter, even sporting a straw hat dangling with yellow chicks.
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