Our secret wedding

Kim didn't want any grumpy guests at her wedding

- Jules Lewicki

Nobody in the family really liked Grandma Jean. She's Dad's mum and was always grumpy.

A strict mother, she'd N made Dad's life hell as a boy, always telling him he was hopeless.

Jean's husband had fled in the early years, and I guess she took it out on my dad, Stephen. He left home at 17.

'It was the best day of my life,' he told me once. 'Apart from when you and your sister were born, of course.'

Grandma couldn't do much about Dad leaving home, but she continued to make his life a misery.

Dad felt duty-bound to visit her, and she'd spend the whole time telling him how useless he was.

'You're just like your father,' she'd say. 'A waste of space. You're never going to do anything with your life.'

At 23, Dad met my mum, Pam, and they fell in love. When they were engaged, he plucked up the courage to introduce her to his mother.

'I don't know what you see in him,' Jean said to Mum. You must be desperate.'