Connection brings me back to calm

She's been called the 'original influencer', so what makes millions want to know what author and blogger Louise Pentland is thinking? Psychologies meets her to find out...

- HOLLY TREACY

If you have never come across Louise Pentland's social media accounts, YouTube channel, or website, you're probably in the minority. She's been blogging since 2009, and has millions of followers for one reason: her content is full of joy. But while she was busy sprinkling happiness out into the world at the beginning of this year, she didn't feel she was experiencing much joy in her own life. That's not to say she didn't enjoy her life - according to Pentland, she liked the things she was doing: 'I enjoy being a mum, I enjoy my job, and I enjoy looking after my house,' she says, 'but if someone had asked what I did for fun, I wouldn't have known what to say. That's when I decided that I was going to begin doing things for myself outside of my children and work, outside of filming for social media, just living.'

Yet, when Pentland began opening herself up to these things, her inner critic kicked in: 'I felt lazy and negligent, and I was adding all these negative labels to myself,' she confesses, 'which no one else was saying; it was my own internal voice. When I really burrowed into it, those were things that I'd been told as a child.

'My mum died when I was really young,' Pentland shares. 'She became ill when I was five years old and passed away [from breast cancer] when I was seven.' Later, her father remarried, but Pentland found her new stepmother particularly challenging. 'I was often told I was lazy, forgetful, or not working hard enough, and I think these labels had been laying dormant for a long time. I'd done a lot to be able to cope and plaster over them.'