Dreading The Dating Clamour

Being on a dating app can sometimes feel more mechanical than magical. Fellow dating app users describe their experience with the exhaustion of incessant scrolling, and mental health experts give a lowdown on how to navigate dating fatigue

- Samreen Tungekar

“When you’re talking to eight to 10 people at the same time, the “what’s up” becomes really tiring to answer. The texting becomes lame after a point,” says 33-year-old Ektaa, a journalist based in Delhi. Ektaa is one of many people experiencing dating fatigue, which, in simple words, is exhaustion from the constant and overuse of dating apps.

How many times have you abruptly ended a conversation with someone because exchanging pleasantries, getting a lowdown on what someone’s looking for, and then the same “Hey” three times a day just got on your nerves? When something begins to induce stress rather than reduce it, a burnout is inevitable. Dating fatigue is a result of the same.

Deepika Singh from Delhi says she has tried out almost all dating apps, and uninstalled them for various reasons too. “I left Aisle in a month because I hardly got any matches, and on the other hand, on OkCupid, I got so many messages on the first night that I uninstalled it the next morning,” she says.

Singh feels that the newness and originality also diminishes. “A lot of people use the same standard text for their bio, and it's harder to find someone who can hold my attention. Secondly, while it was fun and self-indulgent to talk about myself earlier, now it gets repetitive and exhausting and I really don't feel like going through the same routine of telling my name, what I do, what brings me here and the likes,” she says.