Not Without My Father

Dancer, filmmaker and writer AISHWARYAA RAJINIKANTH DHANUSH is also the daughter of India’s biggest superstar. She tells Vogue about her upcoming memoir and how her father inspired her to be her own person.

- Shahnaz Siganporia

My 18th birthday was a very special one. I had convinced my father that I would bring my birthday in at a discotheque. It was all the rage back then and I had never been to one. So my father agreed and, on the day, the entire Rajinikanth clan (friends and family) packed ourselves into eight cars and went to celebrate my birthday. We walked in and within seconds of us reaching there were close to 20 bouncers fighting off the crowds that had gathered to catch a glimpse of appa. He let me take in the experience for a bit and then said, “You wanted to see a discotheque; I have done my duty and shown you one. Let’s leave now.” But those 15 minutes were the best birthday I’ve ever had. Most people assume Rajinikanth’s daughter must have a wild party in Goa or something for her 18th birthday, but that was never my life. He grounded us. Of course we were aware of his fame, crowds and fans. But for me he was just my appa. I think my memoir will break these pre-conceived notions that people have of celebrity kids. But this wasn’t the reason I wrote it; it was almost a happy after-effect.

MY SO-CALLED LIFE

I used to write soppy poems and get overexcited every time we were given essay-writing assignments in school—writing has always been something I loved doing. But as I grew up, between filmmaking, dance and other priorities, I was not actively writing for a long time. But over the last two years I started writing again. It began with messages that turned into poems and short stories over Whatsapp. And the friends with whom I shared these encouraged me to write something bigger.