'Caring FOR LIONEL was a PRIVILEGE'

Caroline Elton shares her experience of growing up with an autistic brother and looking after him in later life

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Autistic. That was a word that my parents didn’t share with my sister Liz or me when we were children. They offered no explanation as to why our older brother Lionel rocked, or bit his hand when agitated, or asked interminable questions about bus routes and train times. Instead, a low-lying cloud of mystery permeated the household. Liz - who was four years older than me — and I never asked our parents questions about our brother. We picked up the message that Lionel’s behaviour wasn’t a suitable topic of conversation.

It's hardly surprising that Lionel’s autism wasn't a regular topic around our kitchen table — in 1949, when Lionel was born, few medical professionals had heard of autism. Lionel didn’t start speaking until he was nearly five, but he did become fully verbal and a fluent reader. What those early doctors didn't recognise was that he had amazing talents in music and an extraordinary capacity for mental arithmetic. He could multiply any pair of three-figure numbers and tell you the answer almost as soon as you had finished posing the question. He was finally diagnosed with autism when he was a teenager.

Growing up