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No regrets banning social media for my young teen

December 09, 2024

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The Straits Times

I restricted my then 13-year-old daughter's access to such apps and screen time to protect her, and I can see how she has benefited from the decision

- Jane Ng

No regrets banning social media for my young teen

When I gave my daughter a mobile phone three years ago when she was 13, I did not allow her to have access to social media.

Having read the literature on the ills of social media on teenage girls in particular, I decided to err on the side of caution.

When she entered secondary school in 2022, she was among the minority who did not have a social media presence.

I explained to her that I felt she was too young to handle the possible ill effects of social media, specifically Instagram, with research that found links to depression and body-image issues. I also reassured her that we could revisit this decision when she was older.

She accepted my decision even if she was not entirely happy about it.

In the light of the recent move by Australia to ban social media for under-16s at the end of 2025, I reflected on my decision and how it has worked for my daughter in the last three years.

To be transparent, it was not just social media that I restricted. There were other measures I took as I did not want her free time to be consumed by screen activities.

We gave her my husband's old phone, with a slower processing speed. She used her elder brother's old SIM card with just 500MB of data a month (which he had used for the three years prior).

We used a parental control app and restricted screen time to three hours a day, with more time during weekends or school holidays. Any increase was subject to approval.

The phone was shut down during her sleeping hours, at a time pre-determined by us. There were also restrictions on downloading new apps.

Both her and her brother's mobile phones were to be left in the living room at night.

To an outsider, the measures may sound draconian.

But for a mum about to hand her 13-year-old daughter a mobile phone, it provided me with a sense of security that I was not letting her into the big unknown on her own.

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