Single mothers

SKETCHES

- ANA MARIE PAMINTUAN

A single mother I know works as a caregiver. Not yet 25, she already has two daughters, having fallen head over heels for a man she met within months of arriving in Manila from the provinces. The man married her but began slapping her around and proved to be a deadbeat, spending whatever he earned on himself and his drug habit. The single mom has been forced to rely on her mother for financial help in the children's expenses.

The single mom's mother is a kasambahay who had hoped that her eldest daughter would go on to college in Manila after finishing high school in their province. Instead the girl fell in love, became a battered wife, and now in her third pregnancy has decided to finally dump the deadbeat (her mother hopes).

Still another mother who was left to care for her daughter when her husband began working overseas became heartbroken upon learning that the husband had found another woman abroad. One day the mother drank insecticide in front of her daughter, regretted it when the poison began taking effect, but it was too late to save her life.

Another single mother I personally know worked as a store clerk and, on the side, posed naked online for a fee. We learned about her sideline belatedly; I was told that it's a pretty common livelihood among poor women in our country.

Such stories of struggling to juggle the responsibilities of motherhood and provide for one's children are common among single mothers.

These are stories of hardship, often involving abuse. The road to solo parenthood is almost always paved with trauma.