Sorry is the hardest word...

For a nation that is famously apologetic, Britain apparently has a hard time saying sorry. Olivia Petter asks why we find it so difficult to express remorse - especially when it's genuine

- By Olivia Petter

Saying “sorry” is easy. It's just one word, two syllables. You can say it faster than you can sneeze. Meaning it, however, is a lot harder. According to research commissioned by the language-learning platform Babbel, Britons have 15 uses for the word, with just one of them meaning regret. So seemingly sorry are we all the time that we don't even know what it means any more.

Here are some of the ways we're using “sorry” incorrectly: to ask someone to move out of the way. To ask someone to repeat themselves. To show empathy. To express disbelief. To disagree. To mock. And, if we’re British, to preface literally any sentence ever.

“In British English, ‘sorry’ has evolved beyond its original role as an expression of remorse,” explains Noél Wolf, cultural and linguistic expert at Babbel, whose research also found that we use the word “sorry” an average of nine times a day. “It now serves as a social lubricant and a flexible tool of communication used in all sorts of everyday interactions.”

It also reflects our nationwide desire to avoid conflict by way of old-fashioned, sturdy politeness. We keep calm and carry on, as is the British way. “In a culture where directness can feel impolite, and personal space, both emotional and physical, is protected, ‘sorry’ can smooth over moments of friction, no matter how minor,” says Wolf.

The problem with such an overuse of the word is that it has become diluted beyond recognition, and now we’re unsure how to apologise properly for something that actually warrants remorse. How can any of us truly be sorry if we don’t know how to say it? If we’re saying it too much, does the word even mean anything any more? And why do so many of us resort to insipid platitudes when apologising? Few sentences are more grating to hear than “Sorry if I upset you…”