Marianne Lewis & Wendy Smith

More and more, people today exist in "echo chambers" where the only opinions they hear-or want to hear-are those similar to their own.

- MEREDITH WOLF SCHIZER

What is both/and thinking? How does it compare to either/or thinking?

Smith As parents, partners, employees and leaders, we're caught in tug-of-wars. Do we prioritize work or family, current targets or learning new skills, social or financial needs? Facing a dilemma, we typically make a choice: A or B. We then stick with that choice. This either/or thinking can be helpful in the short run. Yet it limits our options. Worse, it can lead us down a rabbit hole, overemphasizing one side until we're stuck.

Both/and thinking starts with recognizing paradoxes within our dilemmas. Think yin-yang. Interwoven contradictions reinforce each other. Light defines dark and vice versa. In life, beneath work/life dilemmas lie paradoxes of self/other, short-term/ long-term, giving/taking. Caring for ourselves creates energy and resources to care for others. Caring for others generates goodwill and support for ourselves. Noticing paradoxes helps us embrace tensions and find more creative, lasting solutions.

 

More and more, people today exist in "echo chambers" where the only opinions they hear-or want to hear-are those similar to their own. Why should we want to broaden our perspectives?

Lewis_We're not sharing much these days. We're in trench warfare. Each side thinks it has the answer. They dig in, surrounded by like-minded others, dehumanize the opposition and fire away. The nastier the insults, the deeper the trenches and greater the casualties.