Friendship as MEDICINE

We live in a culture with endless advice for improving your relationship, raising your kids, or managing your team at work.

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Romantic partnerships and family ties are seen as life pillars, with entire industries devoted to supporting and studying them. But adult friendship? That often gets treated as a nice-to-have. Optional. Maybe even a little childish.

Yet friendship may be one of the most overlooked protective factors we have. In the noise of productivity, coupledom, and self-reliance, we've sidelined something essential. And it's costing us. The truth is, friendship isn't a luxury. It's medicine. And we need to start treating it like that.

Across the UK, friendship networks are shrinking. A 2021 study by the Campaign to End Loneliness found that nearly half of adults said they felt lonely at least some of the time. Another UK-wide survey revealed that one in five adults had no close friends at all. That's not just sad, it's dangerous. Chronic loneliness is as harmful to physical health as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. It weakens the immune system, increases cardiovascular risk, and raises cortisol levels, keeping the body in a prolonged state of stress. Psychologically, the toll is just as severe. People without close, emotionally supportive friendships are more likely to experience anxiety, depression, and burnout. They're also more likely to struggle during major life transitions like bereavement, divorce, or job loss, precisely the times when friends become most vital.

"Friendships can hold space for grief, absurdity, boredom and celebration, all without the need to solve anything"

Why do we struggle?

Part of it is biological. 'Adult friendship is not an absolute necessity for evolutionary survival,' explains life coach and mindset expert Chantal Dempsey, 'whereas finding a partner and starting a family is. Subconsciously, we would always prioritise our basic needs of survival and reproduction.'