Hot Tips

Is there something you’d like to try in bed, but are too afraid to bring up? Our expert answers all your burning sex questions.

- Helene Lee

Is your sex life going through a dull stage? Is there a subject matter you’re too shy to discuss with your man? Our sex expert has your back.

Our sex drives differ – how do we balance this? 

Masturbation – it’s that simple. For both parties. Think of it as snacking between meals. You still look forward to the main course, but in the meantime, a snack takes the edge off. That’s not to say that the solo sex should take place without the other person: sometimes a woman is not in the mood for intercourse, but she still wants the intimacy of being with her man while he reaches a climax. In this case, she can still be an active participant, using her hands and tongue to bring him to orgasm.

Sometimes my partner doesn’t seem interested, and I feel like it’s my fault. Do men have moments when they’re simply not into sex?

Of course they do! Just like women, men get tired, overworked and stressed, and sex may be the last thing on their mind. Medication, obesity, smoking and drinking can all impact on a man’s desire and ability to have sex. Older men may fear failure because their erections aren’t as strong or as regular as they used to be. Don’t assume you’re to blame. Gently ask him how he’s feeling, what’s wrong, does he want to talk about it. Whatever it is, it can be fixed.

My partner is not shy, and would like to have sex in the garden. What if someone sees us?