Sex While Parenting

Remember your weekends pre-kids, when you rolled around in the sheets before brunch? (Remember brunch?) You can get your sex life back, just as these parents did.

- Jessica Press

IT’S A SCENE that plays out in homes everywhere. The darling little angels are finally asleep, so you start unloading the dryer, replying to emails, and putting away the toys. By the time either of you gets near a bed, the only thing you’re interested in doing is sleeping. Here are some ways you can stop and switch this routine for a sexier one.

Give each other some “transition time.”

All parents play many roles on a typical day. And—just to keep us on our toes—that moment when we typically reunite with our spouse at the end of the day most often happens to coincide with Maximum Kid Crazy: They’re hungry! They’re cranky! They’re dirty! This confluence of factors makes it hard for couples to reconnect. “Each parent needs time alone so they can reorient themselves from their other roles,” says Dr. Suzanne Iasenza, a psychotherapist specialising in couples and sex therapy. Couples need to think about the transitional spaces they can create and give to their partner, she says—whether that means taking a shower or clicking through your inbox or sitting down with a book for 20 minutes and not seething when your partner indulges in his iPad or video games after work. “When couples work together to give this time to each other, they’ll be able to shift into couple time more easily and be able to be present for each other,” says Dr. Lasenza.