My undercover mission on ConservativeHome reveals the extent of Tory delusion

It was probably nothing more than idle curiosity and the desire to know what the enemy is thinking that drew me to the Conservative Home website.

- PETER SMITH

But once I was there, the imperative to stay silent while wading through the messageboards turned out to be a challenge too far.

So, with a mischievous grin on my face, I adopted the persona of a splenetic hard-right lunatic and set out to amuse myself.

An early stab at making a contribution to the nation's great debate about education gave me a chance to test the waters: "I don't think we need to spend too lavishly on education," I suggested. "Education only makes people more argumentative and gives them a false idea of what life has to offer." Isn't that a bit obvious? I asked myself. We don't want to give the game away too early. But I needn't have worried.

"It is not that education makes voters more left-wing," one respondent suggested. "It's that more left-wing people are more likely to go to uni." Is that right? I'd never thought of that: are all those apple-cheeked 18-year-olds left-wing?

Other correspondents were more supportive: "Perhaps there's something in what you say," suggested one reader, helpfully. "By spending money on education, Conservatives are ultimately financing Labour voters, and why would they do that?" And he concluded with a reassuring "good point, well made".

There was nothing left-wing about the responses I got when the subject of tax havens came up. Speaking on behalf of those with "a few quid to stash away somewhere safe from the prying eyes of the authorities", I offered up a prayer of thanks that "Boris got us out of the European Union before they got their hands on the Cayman Islands". When one response rebuked me because my alleged "greed and selfishness outweigh [my] patriotism and duty to society", others leapt to my defence.

"Rubbish," exclaimed one of my new companions, "everyone has the right to do with their money what they wish", adding that attacking greed and selfishness was "virtually socialism, that people's money is not theirs and it is the state's by right".