Into the void
New Zealand Listener|November 11 - 17, 2023
A whole lot of fuss about nothing is filling the gap while the new government takes shape behind the scenes.
Michele Hewitson
Into the void

Hello. Are you still there? Of course you are. We're all still here, stuck in this locked airless room with the stopped clock.

By the time you read this, somebody might have unlocked the door and fixed the clock. We may have a government. Or we may not. Who knows? If anybody does know, they're staying schtum.

Even Act leader David Seymour, whose lips usually flap faster than a ventriloquist's dummy - which, come to think of it, he rather resembles appears to have sealed his own mouth with Super Glue. He has even forfeited having (yet another) swipe at New Zealand First leader Winston Peters. And there was one for the having.

After a day of evidence at the coronial inquest into the 2019 terrorist massacre of 51 people at Christchurch mosques, Peters posted a tweet stating the office of then prime minister Jacinda Ardern received an email of the terrorist's manifesto minutes before the killings started and that she failed to share this information with the public and with him. It took no time at all to establish, complete with TV footage, that Ardern had told the public about the email two days after the shootings.

Therein lay the opportunity, a nice juicy opportunity, for Seymour to unleash his inner chihuahua to take out the seat of Peters' pinstriped suit. Ruff, ruff. Instead, nothing.

That glue Seymour used to keep his trap shut must be industrial strength because he and Peters have a long history of trash-talking each other. Seymour has called Peters a clown and a "charismatic crook". Peters has called Seymour a politcal cuckold. And so grown-uply on.

Maybe Seymour's dead. We know Peters certainly isn't. He will never die. He's the undead, as the election results proved. Peters, like Jesus before him, has risen again. As he foretold.

This story is from the November 11 - 17, 2023 edition of New Zealand Listener.

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This story is from the November 11 - 17, 2023 edition of New Zealand Listener.

Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 8,500+ magazines and newspapers.

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