Craft The Life You (Truly) Want

You may think purpose is a destination, but psych experts say it's more of a journey - and you have to reshape it over and over. Not sure where to start? Follow these steps.

- AMELIA HARNISH

From the outside, it looked as if Tenise Hordge, 39, had it all. After spending 18 years climbing the corporate ladder, the engineer had the impressive title, big salary and corner office. But she was unhappy.

After her daughter was born prematurely in 2017, she began to feel adrift at work. "Who cares about this title I have?" she remembers thinking. It didn't help her carry her baby to full term. The money was not helping her daughter come home from the hospital sooner. Then came 2020. Tenise was exhausted, in so many ways. "I didn't want to continue being this person I no longer was," she recalls.

You might call it an identity crisis, but psychologists would describe what Tenise was going through as a crisis of purpose.

What does that actually mean? Purpose is a driving force in your life that connects you to values and ideals bigger than yourself, says psychologist and the author of Nervous Energy, Dr Chloe Carmichael. Some prioritise crushing it in their careers. Excellence is a value, "so the drive to be excellent as a professional can be a purpose," says Dr Carmichael. But purpose can also take other forms - you may be motivated to devote yourself to religion, create art or advocate for a social cause.

All this may seem a bit abstract, but research shows purposeful living has a real impact on our well-being. Not only are those who move through life with a defined purpose more likely to stay happy in their jobs, but they are also better at keeping up with regular health screenings and less likely to have anxiety and depression. A strong sense of purpose has been linked to greater longevity too.