Flying solo, going stag, being footloose and fancy free there are countless ways to describe those who are single by choice, after a partnership breakdown or when a spouse dies.
Some people leapfrog from relationship to relationship, settling for someone who maybe isn't right for them, because of the fear of being alone. But being single can be empowering; it’s an opportunity to take a journey of self-discovery, to lead a rich, inspired and fulfilling life.
Whether you are single for now or choose to be single for life, you are not broken and you don’t need to be fixed. Yet popular culture paints a vastly different picture.
Being single should be as validated and respected by society as coupledom is, but it’s not always the case. Narrative therapist Nicole Hind says part of the problem is that we're a family-centric society. Children, families, partners and finding love can make us feel that there is all there is, and if we are single then we have missed the boat,” she says.
Across the globe, singledom has indeed copped a bad rap. Social scientist Bella DePaulo collated data from 1000 American undergraduates who were asked to note characteristics of married versus singles. Married people were far more likely to be seen as mature, happy, kind and honest. On the flip side, singles were described as immature, self-centred, unhappy and lonely. There's no doubt that if others see singles as less than, it can negatively impact on how singles see themselves.
It's not just the younger generation in the Western world who perceive being single as undesirable. In China, the term sheng nu which translates to "leftover women" is a term coined by the All-China Women's Federation for unmarried women.
This story is from the Issue 203 edition of WellBeing.
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This story is from the Issue 203 edition of WellBeing.
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