"Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence.
As far as possible without surrender
be on good terms with all persons.
Speak your truth quietly and clearly;
and listen to others,
even the dull and the ignorant;
they too have their story.
Be yourself.
Especially, do not feign affection.
Neither be cynical about love;
for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass."
-From Desiderata by Max Ehrmann
"Be yourself. Especially, do not feign affection." And yet, so many of us are guilty of doing just that, day after day. Holding on to a relationship way past its expiry date, being part of friendships that are hanging by a thread, keeping our mouths shut while resentment bubbles under the surface, being docile to please others, permitting others to crush our self-respect so as not to be perceived as rude... Well, the list is endless!
Yet, we keep on feigning. No, we don't do it out of ill intentions. In fact, most of the time, our intentions are good-we simply don't want to hurt the other. So, we feign love, care, affection, and attention. We push our true feelings deep into the hollow of our heart and continue to put on an act. We 'lather, rinse, repeat' in an endless loop till the cows come home!
Gradually, this charade spills into other parts of our lives. We cling to a job we are miserable in because we fear financial insecurity or never put a toe out of line, petrified of consequences. We get so used to behaving in this manner that it becomes our default behaviour. But the question is, Why? Because we are operating from our inauthentic self, fearing a backlash for not conforming to societal expectations.
Conformity Demands Inauthenticity
This story is from the September 2023 edition of Life Positive.
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This story is from the September 2023 edition of Life Positive.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 8,500+ magazines and newspapers.
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