Things Not To Say To Your Kids
Woman's Era|January 2022
An alternative list.
Unmana Dutta
Communicating with your child in the most effective way is an art, which requires a lot of conscious effort from the part of the parent to analyse each word and sentence before it is being said to the child. Any problematic statement said to a child gets registered in the mind of the child, leaving a severe impact into the mind of the child.

Most often parents are seen that they go online and read up a lot about parenting and the qualities of a good parent, and what they can do for their kids and how they can give a better life to the children. However, what the parents often do as a mistake is that they only read up about what they should say, and not read anything about what they should not say to their kids.

Some of the following given statements are often said by parents to their children, which are to be avoided by the parents. And these statements have a major impact on the minds of the children.

I wish you were never born

Sometimes, some things parents say in a lot of anger and do not realise the consequence of the statement that they made. When parents say that they regret the birth of their child, this makes the child feel as a burden for the parents. They feel unwanted. Sometimes the consequence of this simply made statement is so severe that the children assumes it to be a truth and makes assumptions based on this statement. For a child who is not given a particular toy or any wish of the child is being rejected, he or she starts assuming that it is because that the parents didn’t want him or her to be born, they are not fulfilling his or her wish.

I will leave you here

For a child who is showing any kind of tantrum when around in the school or any other place that he or she doesn’t like to be, this very statement that “I will leave you here” by the parent, is increasing the fear and hatred for the place. They, in fact, reinforce the hatred they have for the place, by targeting on the fear that they will be left alone in that place without the parent. Most often, when children go out for school, parents often command the child to “hurry up” and end up scolding the child for taking too long to have their breakfast or while tying the shoelace. However, it is commonly seen that after children leave for school, parents often regret that the last conversation before sending off the child to school was a scolding tone, where the parent could have used a different version, by saying something like, “It will be great if you hurry up a bit.” This statement can make the conversation light and the child would also understand the motive behind the statement.

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