AT A CROSSROADS
Angels on Earth|Jan/Feb 2020
Sometimes the right direction isn’t as clearly marked as you might like
GERALD RAINEY
I SHIFTED UNCOMFORTABLY in my seat as the worship team played their first song. This was our pastor’s last Sunday. He was taking an exciting new position as regional director of the denomination. I was happy for him, but his move had me thinking even more about my own career. What was God’s plan for my life? For Pastor Gary, the road ahead seemed crystal clear. Why couldn’t it be like that for me?

For nine months now I’d been wrestling with making a career change. The idea was to work with my wife, Rikki, in her small company, where she served as a court-appointed fiduciary for vulnerable clients, managing their legal, financial and medical decisions. I’d even talked to Pastor Gary about my struggle. “Sounds like we’re both moving into uncharted waters,” he’d told me. “Just follow God’s direction.”

The difference was, his promotion came with a pay increase. I was most likely looking at a major pay cut, possibly to zero. I’d be giving up a job as the chief financial officer of a large credit union, which came with a good salary and health benefits, and walking away from a firmly established 25-year career. I prayed every day for direction but heard nothing in return.

Now, in church with my wife beside me, the worship team continued to play as I fought to pay attention. I put my head in my hands. Depend on me for everything. I heard the words clearly and immediately looked up. Where had that come from?

I glanced at Rikki. Her head was bowed. “Rikki,” I whispered as I nudged her. “I think God just spoke to me. He told me to depend on him.”

Rikki nodded. “Sounds as if you need to make a decision.”

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