When your home is ruled with a ruthless dictator’s tightly-clenched iron fist, this is not an excuse to engage in needless violence. When evil rears its ugly head, you should always engage it in polite debate. That’s how the Nazis were defeated in World War II, after all. My Rico therefore is an odiously – er, admirably – determined centrist, on a quest to defuse conflict at every opportunity; and I think I’ve found the perfect way to do it.
One of the rebels tells me to raise an “army of chaos”. The idea is that the more trouble I cause across the island – handily tracked by a Chaos Meter at the top of the screen – the more people will rally to my cause. Traumatised by the needlessly violent intro mission however, I don’t want help from the sorts of horrid individuals that would be attracted by that behaviour. Instead, I’m on my way to find and collect the cow gun as peacefully as possible. Yes, cow gun. This is a gun that turns people into cows. And you know how many violent conflicts have been started by cows? Less than seven. Let’s do this.
A little research tells me that the cow gun is located in the Vaivenes region of the island. Opening up the map, it looks distressingly far from my starting point of Hanasacha. Nonetheless, I have a powerful grappling hook, a parachute, and a wingsuit. I’m confident of getting there relatively quickly, and in style. So off I go.
This story is from the May 2022 edition of PC Gamer.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 8,500+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber ? Sign In
This story is from the May 2022 edition of PC Gamer.
Start your 7-day Magzter GOLD free trial to access thousands of curated premium stories, and 8,500+ magazines and newspapers.
Already a subscriber? Sign In
JET SET RADIO
A vibrant Tokyo-like city with an anti-establishment attitude.
BLUE DAWN
INTEL graphics cards have become a genuine contender. How, and why?
WIRELESS GAMING MICE
I challenge you to spot the difference between these wireless rodents and their wired counterparts.
FOILED AGAIN
EN GARDE! is a brief yet riotous piece of swashbuckling nostalgia
PURE MAGIC
BALDUR'S GATE III is a dream RPG that was worth the 23-year wait
THE BEST MECH GAMES ON PC
From anime mecha to rusty 100-ton war machines, the best mech games for giant robot lovers
MECH MY DAY
MECHWARRIOR 5: CLANS is bringing a narrative focus and intricate, handcrafted missions back to the storied series.
HOMEWORLD 3
The space RTS aims to please with its War Games mode
LORDS OF THE FALLEN
World-hopping glow-up
WARHAMMER 40K: SPACE MARINE 2
Chaos is winning right now, I fear