Sorry Not Sorry

Wading through the wave of men’s apologies that continue to wash ashore in Weinstein’s wake

- Sloane Crosley

When I was a kid, I used to steal from my sister on a regular basis. Cassette tapes, dirty novels, hair clips, Game Boy cartridges. Every time she caught me — which was most of the time; I have all the cat-burgling skills of a dog — I’d apologise. And every time, she’d issue the same clarification: “You’re only sorry you got caught.” Fair point. It’s not like I felt guilty while I was pawing for bodice-rippers under her bed. I only felt inconvenienced upon discovering that my actions had consequences. But I did learn that not all apologies are equal. So much so that in 2015 I wrote an op-ed for The New York Times about why women should stop apologising for themselves so much. The piece went viral enough to land me on CBS This Morning, where I was interviewed by Charlie Rose, whose lack of interest in the subject no longer seems like a reflection of my ability to articulate it. You can see it in the clip: Every time the camera cuts to him, he’s picking sleep out of his eye. I mean, he’s really getting in there.