Social Media Rules For My Future Boyfriend
GLAMOUR South Africa|June 2018

All writer Jen Doll wants is a guy without an embarrassing Internet presence. She has a few guidelines…

Jen Doll
Social Media Rules For My Future Boyfriend

A while back, I started seeing a new guy. We were in that fun infatuation stage, and then I looked at his Twitter and found it consisted primarily of juice bar check-ins. It became a joke with my friends: “I’m glad Brent is getting his vitamin C!” “Can Brent pick me up a smoothie next time he hits the juice bar?” and I couldn’t get it out of my head. Other problems were becoming clear, too, but was I really going to get serious with the mayor of the juice bar?

I moved on, next dating a man whose posts included mortifyingly basic hashtags like #blue #sky #skies #blueskies #pictures. I could only imagine how he might hashtag a photo of us with #cute #couple. Then there was the guy whose tweets were so badly bro-tastic (think, “This presidential debate is hella dank, yo.”) that a male friend intervened. We didn’t last four months.

This story is from the June 2018 edition of GLAMOUR South Africa.

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This story is from the June 2018 edition of GLAMOUR South Africa.

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