Staying friends with your ex might be hard, but it isn’t impossible if you follow these simple commandments. Neeti Jaychander lays them out for you
Friends with an ex, say what? Before you gasp at this strange phenomenon, hear this. When Hollywood actors Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck broke up, Affleck said in an interview, “Jen’s great. She’s a great person. We’re on great terms. I just saw her this morning, so that’s the reality that I live in.” Garner, on her part, went on to say, “He’s still the only person who really knows the truth about things. And I’m still the only person that knows some of his truths.” Celebrity status aside, Garner and Affleck are just one of thousands of couples who have managed to stay friends with each other. While for most couples, breaking up may seem like the end of the world, there are many who also remain amicable with their ex-spouse or ex-boyfriend. Yep, you heard that right. And no, we aren’t lying! This, however, is not without its share of challenges. If you’re planning to go down this road, take an oath to follow these commandments and you’re golden.
THOU SHALT MOURN BEFORE YOU ATTEMPT FRIENDSHIP
You can’t just go from romantic to platonic overnight! Take some time apart, allow for the feelings to settle, maybe even go out on a few dates with other people so that you’re able to distract yourself from your post-breakup feelings. Psychiatrist Manjula MK says, “If you’re able to be friends with your ex the instant you break up, without any thought of romance or getting back together, then your feelings were obviously not as deep as you thought they were.” To get over any serious relationship, you should ideally take time out to cool off. “No doubt it’s tempting to respond to his text messages, or make plans to meet up, but if you do that and fall back into the same rut, you’ll be repeating the same mistakes that led to your breakup, and sabotage any real chance you have of staying friends with your ex,” she says.
THOU SHALT NOT HANG OUT ALONE
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