There’s a running joke about America’s priorities. Since the development of the automobile just barely lags our development as a nation, the automobile pretty much defines our lives. Forget the day we can exercise our right to vote; we can’t wait for our privilege to drive. In fact, we’ll drive if it’s farther than a block away and even shorter distances if the weather doesn’t suit us. You could say we sort of have to, because nearly everything built within the past 100 years is automobile scale, it’s damn near impossible to walk to anywhere with any kind of significance anymore.
We don’t have to look any further than where we live to see proof of our priorities. By and large, we’ll sacrifice the looks of our most expensive investments, our houses, by erecting imposing shrines for our cars. But, irony of all ironies, we won’t park them in there. No, we’ll let our valuable cars sit on the driveway in the cold and wet for the privilege of packing those giant, blighted rooms with worthless old junk.
Pat Stauner can testify. “I had many new and nice vehicles over the years that sat outside so this car could keep its spot in the garage,” he says. Of course, judging by the way it looks now, it’s justified; it’s simply stunning. But until a few years ago his now LS-swapped 1965 Malibu was hardly more enviable than the plastic Christmas trees, tattered couches, and last season’s fashions that most people pack their garages with.
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