Mark ‘Paddy’ Parish was all too aware that he’d never get around to building his dream bike, so talked to a company who he’d bought a few parts from. They said they could build him just the machine that he wanted so he sold his bike, paid out a sizeable wad of folding, and waited for his new bike to be built. Various emails arrived to show him the progress, and a few trips to see the frame and other parts arrive gave hope but, after a few months, that hope started to fade away. More parts, and more bills, arrived, but the bike didn’t seem to be getting any closer to a complete and running motorcycle. Several thousand pounds later, Paddy got the idea that he’d never see the bike finished, so he paid the company a visit, viewed what was essentially little more than a pile of parts, and decided there and then that the sorry tale had to be brought to a halt. He took that pile of bits away before any more excuses could be made as to why he still hadn’t got a finished bike...
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IN-YER-FACE 'ONDA
BACK IN ISSUE 420, IN THE H-D SUPPLEMENT WE DID FOR THAT ISSUE, WE INTRODUCED YOU TO KNOCKER, AND HIS NO-NONSENSE IRONHEAD – A BIKE THAT GAVE THE FINGER TO BOTH TRADITIONAL BSH CHOPS, AND THE NEW SKOOL RETRO-CHOPPER CROWD TOO.
THE SHINY SURVIVALIST
THERE’S LITTLE DOUBT THAT 2020 DIDN’T REALLY TURN OUT THE WAY THAT ANY OF US EXPECTED, OR HOPED, IT WOULD. MIND YOU, I DID WONDER IF THE GLOBAL PANDEMIC MIGHT’VE INFLUENCED BIKE BUILDERS IN A MORE VISIBLE WAY THAN IT SEEMS TO HAVE, AND EXPECTED A RESURGENCE IN THE BUILDING OF ‘SURVIVAL BIKES’.
MONTANA REO
MANY YEARS AGO I BUILT TWO FXR SOFTAILS – MINNESOTA FATS (A SORT OF SUPER FAT BOY), AND DAKOTA BLACK (A PROPER CHOP), ONE FOR ME AND ONE FOR MY MATE JIM. WE’D DREAMT UP THE NAMES IN THE PUB ONE NIGHT AS PART OF AN IMAGINED SERIES OF BIKES – THE NORTHERN STATES SERIES. THEY CAME OUT WELL, AND WERE FEATURED IN BSH 170 IN 1998.
MORTICIA
I BUILT THIS CHOP 38 YEARS AGO (THE DRY BUILD WAS IN MY BEDROOM), AND I TRY TO KEEP IT LIKE IT WAS WHEN IT WAS FIRST FINISHED. I USED TO PRIDE MYSELF ON IT STARTING FIRST KICK, AND NOT LEAKING OIL – IT STILL STARTS FIRST KICK (OCCASIONALLY SECOND), BUT THERE IS NOW, NEARLY 40 YEARS LATER, ONE SLIGHT OIL LEAK…
UJB UNIVERSAL JAPANESE BOBBER
ONE OF THE WORST THINGS TO HEAR WHEN OUT AND ABOUT AMONGST ANY GATHERING OF MOTORCYCLE TYPES IS A SLIGHTLY NASAL VOICE SAYING, IN THE PAUSE BETWEEN PEOPLE SPEAKING, ‘DID YOU KNOW THAT…’ BECAUSE YOU KNOW, YOU JUST KNOW, THAT YOU’RE GOING TO TURN ROUND AND BE CONFRONTED WITH AN ANORAK.
LONG SHOP MUSEUM BIKE SHOW
THE THIRD BIKE SHOW AT THE LONG SHOP MUSEUM IN LEISTON, SUFFOLK, WAS HELD ON SUNDAY SEPTEMBER 13TH. IT’D BEEN HANGING IN THE BALANCE, LIKE EVERYTHING ELSE THIS YEAR, BUT UNLIKE MOST IT, WAS DEEMED OKAY TO GO AHEAD, DESPITE CONCERNS OVER LIMITING NUMBERS AND KEEPING EVERYONE SOCIALLY DISTANCED.
THE REWARD...
AS I’M SURE YOU’RE AWARE (IF YOU’RE NOT, REALLY? WHERE’VE YOU BEEN? DOWN A WELL?) OUR CHOSEN LIFESTYLE IS, AS ELIZABETH BATHORY MIGHT SAY, IN DIRE NEED OF AN INJECTION OF FRESH BLOOD BECAUSE… WELL, WE’RE ALL GETTING A BIT OLD, A BIT PAST IT THESE DAYS, AREN’T WE?
FACTORY CUSTOM
DURING MY VISIT TO MUDDY BEACH CUSTOMS BACK IN AUGUST, WHERE I TOOK THE PICS OF CHRIS LINDSAY’S CUSTOM CHAMPS-WINNING S&S (AS FEATURED LAST ISSUE), GUS, THE MAIN MAN, ARRANGED FOR A WHOLE LOAD MORE SCOTTISH BIKES TO ARRIVE TO BE PHOTOGRAPHED TOO. AS WE DON’T GET UP ACROSS THE BORDER THAT OFTEN THESE DAYS, I GOT ‘EM ALL IN THE CAN, AND YOU’LL SEE ‘EM IN A FORTHCOMING ISSUE.
HOT ROD SHOUEL
IF YOU’RE A LONG-TERM READER OF THIS AUGUST PERIODICAL (AND THE ONES PUBLISHED OTHER MONTHS TOO), THEN YOU SHOULD BE AWARE OF THE BIKES, OR AT LEAST THE KIND OF BIKES, BUILT BY A GENTLEMAN BY THE NAME OF VINCENT SUMMERS
AMOC CUSTOM SHOW
AH, THE JOYS OF A SEPTEMBER MORNING – STILL SOME OF THE SUNSHINE FROM SUMMER, BUT THOSE SOFT TONES OF EARLY AUTUMN COMING IN, WHICH MAKES FOR A PERFECT COUNTRY RIDE... MIND YOU, I’M NOT SO KEEN ON THE BARRAGE OF CONKERS AND ACORNS WHICH SEEM TO MAKE A BEELINE FOR THE HELMET.
Notes for new breeders
Experienced breeders will tell you that there are a number of things they wish someone had told them before they had their first litter. This article will share a few of those items with you in the hope that it will encourage you to read more and ask more questions.
LISA MARIE'S LIFESAVING BREAK FROM SCIENTOLOGY!
Rebuilding her life with psychological therapy forbidden by church dogma
ANA READY FOR NEW SUPERHERO TO SWOOP IN
After Batman Ben, there’s Captain Chris!
A-ROD TO AFFLECK: HANDS OFF J.LO!
Slugger all wound up over online fawning
DAYS: BEN SEARCHES FOR CIARA
Ciara gets ahold of Rhodes’s phone and calls Ben, but they have a bad connection. “Prior to this, he’s had a couple of moments in his heart and his soul that connected to her being alive on a psychic vibe type of thing,” explains Robert Scott Wilson (Ben).
Noisy, Ugly, and Addictive
Hyper pop could become the countercultural sound of the 2020s.
THEY CAN'T TAKE THAT AWAY!
Fading Tony Bennett plans final curtain call
WAS BOOTED BEN PLAYED FOR PATSY?
Ana de Armas catches flak
FITTED FOR RADIO
Matthew Jackson’s Land Rover 110 retired from the Australian Army to a life of backcountry travel
Ben's BAD BREAK
HE’S GONNA NEED SOME DUNKIN’! AFTER NEARLY A YEAR OF PDA, BEN AFFLECK IS HAVING TROUBLE GETTING OVER ANA DE ARMAS.