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'Au-DHD feels like my brain is fighting itself'

Scottish Daily Express

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April 07, 2025

It's like having a nursery class in your brain,' says Leanne Maskell, 32, who has AuDHD - autism and ADHD, two neurodiverse conditions which have impacted her life since childhood. 'They are all fighting against each other all the time.It feels like half of my brain - the autistic side - has been desperate tofigure out the rules, to fit in, be perfect, get a job,' says Leanne. 'While the other half - the ADHD side - is 'let's break the rules, quit the job, do something that is completelythe opposite'.But it was only when she was diagnosed with both - ADHD at 25 and autism at 31 - that everything fell into place.

- Edited by HANNAH BRITT

'Au-DHD feels like my brain is fighting itself'

BREAKTHROUGH

'People with ADHD are good at starting things, but get overwhelmed by lots of ideas and they can't finish them because they get distracted. It's about novelty seeking.

'With autism it's about finishing things, being predictable and understanding exactly what is going to happen and how. It was exhausting dealing with that.'

That constant to-ing and fro-ing and fighting in her brain is captured in her new book Au-DHD: Blooming Differently.

'ADHD and autism have only been diagnosed in the same person since 2013,' says Leanne. 'Before, the DSM [the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders] said if someone had one, it excluded the other. Now statistics say there is a crossover of up to 50 to 70 per cent and ADHD is 75 per cent hereditary.'

Looking back, she says, it explains a lot. She began modelling at just 13, going on to appear in Vogue and i-D magazine as well as campaigns for Urban Outfitters and ASOS. She often didn't know how to react to people and couldn't say no.

'The first shoot I did I felt really embarrassed and awkward. I had two men getting me changed. They saw me being uncomfortable and burst out laughing, saying 'We are gay, we don't care about your body'. I didn't realise at the time that wasn't an OK thing to have happened.

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