WHERE DID ALL THE GOOD BARS GO?

An unfortunate fact of life: As you approach 50, it gets harder and harder to find a decent place to drink.

- DAVID COGGINS

IT'S EASY TO ROMANTICIZE the good old days. Back when men wore suits and we didn't know red meat was bad for us and there were trout in all the rivers. Yes, everything was better in this mythical past we never knew. But let's acknowledge one thing that is true: There's a crisis in the modern drinking world. Where are the good bars?

It's more complicated to get a drink than it should be. And I live in New York, where bars mean something. I don't ask for much: a dark room without much going on. I can take it from there. Today, bars are themed; they're kitschy; they're tourist magnets. Others installed TVs for the World Series or World Cup and never turned them off. Now they're on cable news, for goodness' sake. The whole point of being in a bar is to escape the news!

That's just the decor. What about the company? A bar should have regulars and a feeling of easygoing, unstated fellowship. The world moves fast, and here we are to take a moment or two to regroup with others doing the same. These days, you sit next to people taking pictures of martinis getting warm. A line out the door reassures them that the Instagram photo is worth the wait.